A Blog About Green Livin' and Raisin' Chicks in Arizona

This is my opinion on the No-Kids-Allowed controversy.  I’m a bit out-spoken in this area and not afraid to drop the P.C. act and just spill it like I see it.  (Okay, I’m a little scared I might get screamed at for what I’m about to write… but I can deal with it.)

Some friends and I have been having some long discussions regarding the following article:
No Kids Allowed Movement Growing

As a soon-to-be mama, you’d think I’d be appalled at people judging where I can or cannot take my kids.

I’m not, not in the slightest bit. I’d prefer it wasn’t a “ban”, but use other alternatives, and here’s just a couple reasons why:

• I have forked out $60+ for dinner with my husband, only to have it ruined by a screaming child sitting next to us in a dining establishment.
• I have gone home to find macaroni and cheese in my hair from some kid flinging it.
• I have sat miserably through NON-KIDS movies that we forked out $50 for between tickets and snacks, only to miss huge chunks due to wailing babies. (and a couple friends just went through this themselves with a lady who took her 3 day-old baby to Rise of the Planet of the Apes), and they had a babysitter to watch their 1 year old to let them have a special night out together, only to have it ruined by a screamer.
• I have gone shopping, and left with a headache due to a child pitching fits in the aisles.
• I have watched a child running loose in a restaurant fall and split her lip open and chip her front teeth on a tile floor, her parents completely unaware she’d run off because they thought she was “playing” under the table.

That’s just a few examples, I’ve seen more over the years but those come to mind.

Parents are upset over this because they feel that DINKS (Dual Income No Kids), and retired couples, young couples without kids, etc. are banning their choices over where to eat, what time to go to movies, etc. etc.  They feel it is unfair and that this is “America” afterall.

Truth be told, the No-Kids-Allowed movement has become a movement because it is, in fact, a seriously growing problem.

It is the fault of parents who refuse to be parents and guide their children towards acceptable behaviors in a public setting.

See, I can’t walk up to you in a restaurant anymore and say “Look, your screaming child that just threw mac-n-cheese in my hair, that you’re deliberately ignoring in hopes she/he will stop, is bugging the crap out of about 100 people, please take him/her outside till she calms down”.

It’s not PC and it’s a good way to start a larger more adult argument right inside the restaurant, causing even more discomfort to the other patrons.

Instead, we glare at the parents with bitter hate in hopes they’ll pick up on it and fix the problem. Nope, they just sit there, ignoring their screaming child, oblivious to everyone around them.

I think there are better solutions than a No-Kid Ban but to bring about an awareness of the issue, something had to be done.

My favorite solution thus so far would be for a separation within the restaurants.

We need to have “Family Friendly” dining on one side, and No-Kids on the other.  Restaurants are still divided for the most part into two sections, as they were for years, for Smoking vs Non-Smoking. UTILIZE IT!!!!  (My husband brought this up, I’m not sure if he heard it from somewhere or not but I think it’s brilliant).

A screaming child room would be awesome, but bathrooms or outside will suffice for now.

Another practice would be awareness of it which is actually why I’m posting on it to begin with. We need to re-institute some parenting “etiquette”, and that starts by bringing it to people’s attention.   Just bringing it to people’s attention might help make them realize there’s a problem.

Now: As a very soon-to-be mom, I’m taking a vow of my own.

• I acknowledge that to get a kid ready for public settings, you have to introduce them to it.
  I will choose family-friendly restaurants that are age-appropriate and keep a close eye for annoyance levels of others and be accommodating to them, not myself.  I will also apologize on the way past them, let them know I’m on it, and maybe just maybe set an example for others. (hopefully)
• I will not take my child to upscale or “more adult” type restaurants.  If they don’t have a kids menu and crayons, no sense going. Denny’s, here I come.
• If my child starts to cry or pitch a fit or whatever, I will take them either outside or to a bathroom until I can calm them down, away from everyone, no matter how kid-friendly the restaurant is.
• I will teach my kids proper public-setting behavior. I will not let my child run loose, throw food, or screech in loud decibels. If they are too young to understand/comprehend an inside voice, they do not go. Period. It’s called “Hire a Babysitter”
• Movies- Oh boy, movies… (This is actually what kicked off the whole discussion.).
  NO BABIES IN THEATERS. PERIOD!!!!People taking newborns into theaters has got to be the most self-absorbed disgusting behavior I have ever seen apart from completely ignoring your child’s screeching temper-tantrum in a public setting.  Movies are expensive, they are for entertainment, and you have no right to ruin everyone’s night out because you wanted to get out of the house but felt stuck because you have a newborn wailing child.If your baby is too young for a babysitter, this is a good indication that your ass should be at home,until they are old enough to be watched. It’s hardly a sacrifice to miss a movie or two during that first year until their old enough to be babysat (on occasion) for a parents night out.Rent it on DVD when it comes out or go with a friend while your husband stays home and gives you a break (or vice-versa).
• Kids under 5 don’t need to go to a movie in my opinion. (I’m tempted to say 6, but I recall certain excitement about movies when I was around 5 but then again, I had a mom who taught us public behavior too).Until they’re old enough to know how to behave, understand expectations (and consequences of not behaving), how not kick the chairs in front of them and stay in their seats, they don’t go. It’s a waste of money, not enjoyable for other people let alone yourself because you have to miss half the movie quieting them yourself.

So there.. that’s my rant for the most part.. there’s more but this post is getting kinda long.  So if you’re reading this, and find yourself surprised that other people even are considering a ban and find this shocking, chances are you might be getting glared at yourself….   Sorry!!!